May 13, 2019

72: A{Live} Now: Getting Schooled by Ancestry and Emotions

There are emotions that take some time to reveal what they are about and sometimes we still don’t know. In this episode, I talk about feeling schooled by overwhelming emotions — the big feeling of an emotion that I had no clue what it was about. Wondering if I could hold my own complexity as well as how to be in intense emotions and feel gracefully incompetent. Plus the stories of intergenerational and cultural trauma that revealed, the visceral pain I discovered in my ancestry and how I healed it… My response that honors the survival and life of the lineage.

A Little About A{Live} Now

I’ve found that when I share what’s true in the moment, there is so much ALIVENESS and fullness in me.

That’s why I started the A{Live} Now mini-series, which is within the Embody Podcast. This is the second episode and I intend to share what’s happening in my real life and in my inner world, what’s truly full and alive now.

What’s alive now in me has often been what’s filled the juicy stuff of life: themes, joys, or challenges that others may also be experiencing, a fear and other emotions that bring me to the edge of my fullest expression in the moment.

As you listen, I will also share snippets of how you can support your own heart and soul, know yourself, be your fullest, or heal and love yourself.


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Show Notes

0:00 Intro

1:02 Opening

2:08 Mention of Existential Crisis Episode

3:48 How I Feel When I Am Being Schooled by My Emotions

6:22 We Are All Evolving — What I Recorded in the Past, Allowing for Being Different

8:07 Where It All Began

9:56 New Relationship Brings New Parts of Myself Alive

11:02 Fear of Losing My Chineseness and Complexity

12:29 What Our Family Systems Can Bring Us

14:23 Can I Hold My Own Complexity?

14:40 Can You Take Care of Me?

17:26 Next Up: The Feeling of Being Left to Die

18:58 My Response to My Great-Grand-Parents

19:38 My Mother Told Me More of Our Story: The Woodworker and the Door That Saved Us

22:03 My Honoring Response to My Ancestry in This Story

22:47 Honoring the Ancestral Experience and Not Take It on as My Own

23:56 Processing Other Ancestral Not Necessarily Connected Experiences

25:41 Working Hard but Keeping the Grief Alive

26:36 Giving the Pain to the Rightful Place and Sharing Appreciation

28:40 Gratitude & Allowing the Space

31:29 Placing Words in Context When We Think We’re Losing It

32:56 Diving Deeper Into the Family Line

33:55 Encouraging You to Take Your Own Words and Let Them Flow Into the Soul Space

35:21 May 5th #NativeWomenRunning

36:20 Some Practical Tips to Move Through

37:48 Gratitude

38:00 Quotes by Nayyirah Waheed

39:45 Sponsored by You on Patreon

40:16 Other Embody Podcast Episodes

41:17 Updates in the Embody Newsletter

41:46 Sending You All the Love

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